When I was growing up, a boy that lived next door was chastised repeatedly for his aversion to all things, well, boy-ish.
When he was caught playing with dolls, or doing our hair (he was super talented too), his father would drag him outside kicking and screaming to play baseball with the boys.
I remember how frustrated I was that his father wouldn't let him play with us, and as I grew older, how angry I began to feel that he wasn't allowed to be himself. (For the record, he did experiment romantically with men later on in life and dealt with a lot of self-esteem and anger issues surrounding the way his parents viewed homosexuality).
Today, a few parents seem to be more understanding and accommodating when their children embrace non-traditional gender roles. Angelina Jolie famously came under fire for letting her daughter Shiloh (above) cut her hair and dress like a boy.
"It's not my choice," Jolie said of Shiloh's wardrobe of boy's clothes. "I have a very strong-willed four-year-old girl who tells me what she wants to wear and I let her be who she is...I want to do what's in her heart and what's in her heart is to dress like that. I think it's beautiful."Jolie had the same approach to Shiloh's hair: "Shiloh cried and said, 'Please cut my hair off, I don't want to have long hair,'" Jolie explained. "I'm not going to leave it long because somebody thinks I should."
Cheryl Kilodavis of Seattle feels the same. The mother of 5-year-old Dyson who wears dresses published a book "My Princess Boy," that has been receiving national attention. It was profiled in People Magazine and Cheryl and son recently appeared on NBC's "The Today Show."
Recently, Gwen Stefani also raised eyebrows when she let son Kingston get his fingers and toes painted.
It's a complicated dilemma parents face when their child wishes to cross dress. When you choose to let your child dress freely like Angelina Jolie and Cheryl Kilodavis did, you run the risk of criticism (and violence) from adults and children who disagree with cross-dressing. Also, there's a possibility that your child will grow older and become embarrassed by what you allowed them to wear.
Conversely, if you prohibit them from expressing themselves freely at a young age like my friend's father did, they can face a lot of pain and identity issues when they become adults.
What's your personal opinion about it? Would you let your son/daughter cross dress if that's what they deeply desired to do? How would you react if you saw a boy in a dress or a girl in a boy's tie? What affect will children who cross dress have on our society in the long run?
Discuss.
Kisses,
Coutura
7 comments:
Anonymous
said...
first of all i'm not against peoples choice but when it comes to this matter i must say that this is the parents decision and like they say spear the rod you spoil the child and allowing a child to do whatever she or he wants is not right because in the long run allowing a child to cross dress is like telling them your okay with them if they turn out gay . for a girl cross dressing can go to a certain distance because it customary for a girl to wear pants if it wasn't then most of us wouldn't be doing it cause not all girls like skirts for one i don't but taking it too the extreme is wanting to look like a boy and that could lead to gayness which is wrong and i don't support that. everyone is allowed to express themselves but there is always a limit.
i have to say that i don't really mind if a child cross dresses but u could only go so far until you cross the line.these celebs are really crossing the line !!! what kind of idiots would let children dress as the opposite gender to that extent!!! are you people on drugs, america is so backward there will only be homosexual relationships in 50-60 years and no heterosexuality. turn around before its too late i plead to you american parents.come out of this trench of stupidity and wake up!!!!
Give me a break, it's only clothes people. My two year old daughter is a total Tom-boy. For the longest time she would rather play with cars and trucks rather than dolls. She likes to dress in clothes that resemble what her older brother wears and her favorite color is blue. I allow her to dress in what makes her happy and play with what is interesting to her. It in no way means that my daughter is going to turn out gay. A lot of times it's simply a stage. My 6 year old son used to like to walk around in a too-too and heels and still likes to watch "My little pony's" He's also very curious like most little boys about a naked female body, so I don't think me letting him dress like a girl made him romantically interested in boys. They are children...let them learn about and explore the world around them the way they want to as long as it's not harmful to them.
Letting a child crossdress is an expression of their interests and allowing them to be themselves. All these people condoning homosexuals are rediculous and closed minded. Saying 'oh theres only gonna be homos in 60 years' is stupid. There were always homosexuals, its just now we can be proud of it and they aren't forced to be straight. plus, dropping the birth rate would be beneficial to our planet as a whole anyway. Not letting someone be who they are kills them inside. I tried to show my parents when I was younger that I was more like a girl than a boy, but they always shunned me when I tried to put on girls' clothing. What is one to do when their brain is a girl but their body is a boy or vice versa? I live a life of pain and fear now, for I was never accepted for who I am back when I was in the moldeable phase where it could have truly made a difference, and I could be happy today. Instead I was oppressed and shuneed to the point where they thought it was removed from me forcefully but instead just painfully buried. All my life I've known that my soul was that of a girl, but nobody would listen to my plea and set me from the confines of this ugly, muscly bitch of a body I have now. And the kicker is I'm not even gay. I'm attracted to women. So as a guy I'm gay for wanting to be a girl, and if I were a girl I'd be gay with another girl. But thats just who I am. And the world isn't understanding enough to let me lead the life my soul desires.
Oh please. Scientific studies show that guys have a feminine side and girls have masculine sides. Cross dressing helps to live your "alter-ego". The fact that cross dressers are gay is a myth. After doing some research, only 5% of cross dressers are homo. Also, when cross dressers change back to themselves, they usually keep some of the qualities they attain when becoming another gender. Men usually become more compassionate and understanding, and women keep the strength and self-esteem from being a boy. But of course, it is still up to the parents, until the children are released from custody.
Im a crossdress and love you to say that to my face I love wearing girls stuff but im not gay or bi some of the girls stuff feels better on me I have been crossdress ing all my life this is who I am and nutting going to change it
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7 comments:
first of all i'm not against peoples choice but when it comes to this matter i must say that this is the parents decision and like they say spear the rod you spoil the child and allowing a child to do whatever she or he wants is not right because in the long run allowing a child to cross dress is like telling them your okay with them if they turn out gay . for a girl cross dressing can go to a certain distance because it customary for a girl to wear pants if it wasn't then most of us wouldn't be doing it cause not all girls like skirts for one i don't but taking it too the extreme is wanting to look like a boy and that could lead to gayness which is wrong and i don't support that. everyone is allowed to express themselves but there is always a limit.
i have to say that i don't really mind if a child cross dresses but u could only go so far until you cross the line.these celebs are really crossing the line !!! what kind of idiots would let children dress as the opposite gender to that extent!!! are you people on drugs, america is so backward there will only be homosexual relationships in 50-60 years and no heterosexuality. turn around before its too late i plead to you american parents.come out of this trench of stupidity and wake up!!!!
Give me a break, it's only clothes people. My two year old daughter is a total Tom-boy. For the longest time she would rather play with cars and trucks rather than dolls. She likes to dress in clothes that resemble what her older brother wears and her favorite color is blue. I allow her to dress in what makes her happy and play with what is interesting to her. It in no way means that my daughter is going to turn out gay. A lot of times it's simply a stage. My 6 year old son used to like to walk around in a too-too and heels and still likes to watch "My little pony's" He's also very curious like most little boys about a naked female body, so I don't think me letting him dress like a girl made him romantically interested in boys. They are children...let them learn about and explore the world around them the way they want to as long as it's not harmful to them.
Letting a child crossdress is an expression of their interests and allowing them to be themselves. All these people condoning homosexuals are rediculous and closed minded. Saying 'oh theres only gonna be homos in 60 years' is stupid. There were always homosexuals, its just now we can be proud of it and they aren't forced to be straight. plus, dropping the birth rate would be beneficial to our planet as a whole anyway. Not letting someone be who they are kills them inside. I tried to show my parents when I was younger that I was more like a girl than a boy, but they always shunned me when I tried to put on girls' clothing. What is one to do when their brain is a girl but their body is a boy or vice versa? I live a life of pain and fear now, for I was never accepted for who I am back when I was in the moldeable phase where it could have truly made a difference, and I could be happy today. Instead I was oppressed and shuneed to the point where they thought it was removed from me forcefully but instead just painfully buried. All my life I've known that my soul was that of a girl, but nobody would listen to my plea and set me from the confines of this ugly, muscly bitch of a body I have now. And the kicker is I'm not even gay. I'm attracted to women. So as a guy I'm gay for wanting to be a girl, and if I were a girl I'd be gay with another girl. But thats just who I am. And the world isn't understanding enough to let me lead the life my soul desires.
Oh please. Scientific studies show that guys have a feminine side and girls have masculine sides. Cross dressing helps to live your "alter-ego". The fact that cross dressers are gay is a myth. After doing some research, only 5% of cross dressers are homo. Also, when cross dressers change back to themselves, they usually keep some of the qualities they attain when becoming another gender. Men usually become more compassionate and understanding, and women keep the strength and self-esteem from being a boy. But of course, it is still up to the parents, until the children are released from custody.
Im a crossdress and love you to say that to my face I love wearing girls stuff but im not gay or bi some of the girls stuff feels better on me I have been crossdress ing all my life this is who I am and nutting going to change it
Nothing wrong with that. It is only clothes.
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